There once was a boy who wanted a pet. When he got to the store, [a newt] it was all he could get he brought it home and to his surprise the newt just laid there; he was barely alive. The pet store owner knew what to do, so he gave the boy a can of Zippo newt food.

Ned's newt:
He's so humongous.
Ned's newt:
Very precocious.
Ned's newt:
He's where the fun is Ne-e-d!

(instrumental)

Ned's newt:
He's enormous, baby.
Ned's newt:
Sometimes disastrous, man-
Ned's newt:
He's where the fun is Ne-e-d! Yeah!

-

Grammar Flash: Lie is intransitive. Lay is transitive. Thus, in the theme song, the use of the word "laid" is incorrect. Also, the word "layed" does not exist.